Capstrzyk / Bugle Call

from Szmery w sercu by SIKSA

	/

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CD in digipack beautifully designed by Ola Szmida & polaprojektowe

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12" pink vinyl version of SIKSA's latest album

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Cassette + Digital Album
Limited to 120 copies, released by Korobushka Records
pink/purple tape with alternative cover made by Ola Szmida & Pola Projektowe

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lyrics

How am I
What's up there with me
The revolution won't be a music gig
I'm very busy – though not much is happening
Didn't have the time to have a proper look at it
For a long while I didn't have the time to think over
What's been up
What's been up with me
Taking the benefit from my screentime though, I'll tell you about the war
that I've lived through
or maybe I won't
Maybe I've already talked about it too much and enough
My war is over
I know a war of some kind will always be ongoing
But I've returned from mine
I feel like a vet and here's my PTSD effects
with all the lovely additions
Flashbacks, nightmares, being overly sensitive, overly dramatic reactions, oversensitivity, bursts of anger
boom boom boom
For many years I've avoided talk about my personal catastrophe
Then for several years I've talked about it
Bursting in turns in tears and anger
What you have all witnessed
maybe I've experienced some permanent change of personality
Hence my incapacity to discuss subjects that I used to
and bidding farewell to katharsis
Because katharsis cannot be just given away
katharsis doesn't need me anymore
Trench neurosis – neurosis after spending too much time on the battlefield
Soldier’s heart – a sensitive one
Shell shock
My heart exploded
I can't just replace it with another one
My heart exploded
22 push ups for war veterans
I can't just replace it
22 push ups for war veterans
Therapeutic asylum for veterans
To help the vets, to help
The boom boom boys
Let them thrash each other
I'm a war vet
a hardened one with a sprained soul
They won't write this about me
So I'll do it myself
I've acquitted myself
and maybe everything I did
it's just encouragment for you
to acquit yourself too
I'm no longer self-flagellating
But I'll ask you for a minute of silence when I'll say:
Revolution will not happen during this gig
Revolution will happen
They will be standing far away from us, hung on their rosaries
Watching as we die, one by one
They will be standing far away from us, hung on their rosaries
I'm alive – and well
I don't know what to tell you besides the simplest, unrevolutionary things
a dog, buckwheat, jasmine rice, the smell of chickpea and dog's favorites
What's up with me, besides simplest unrevolutionary things:
He is and I'm with him, we've met during the war, planted bombs together
a boom boom boy
My holy guardian angel
I dunno how am I, besides the simplest unrevolutionary things
I'm only concerned about him ever dying, and the dog
When I was a kid, before I was going to check
on my parents in their bedroom, if they're still alive
I've prayed for very long
My holy guardian angel
Please dear god bless this food
My holy guardian angel

So I guess this is how I am.
that's all, nothing much.
And when I'll learn myself anew
Then maybe we'll meet again
or maybe
we won't

credits

from Szmery w sercu, released September 17, 2022

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about

SIKSA Poland

SIKSA is a feminist duo arranged for voice, bass, lyrics and bodies. Their concerts combine the energy of a punk, performative poetry or contemporary dance. In the limitations of the instruments and stage presence, the duo finds the strength to carve their own path. In this work, the personal meets the political, and the unspoken meets the deafening. ... more

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